That First Scene

I know, it has been too long since I have posted anything. Life has been a bit hectic. I just finished taking Modern Art and as much as I enjoy art, the class stretched me at times. Now I am in the middle of moving approximatly 530 miles away to the middle of nowhere. So much of a nowhere that I'm begning to wonder just how I'm going to get internet access easily enough to keep up with my new class. It's a fiction writing workshop and I have been looking forward to it for awhile. One of the first assingments was to create three opening scence.

I know how important that first scene can be. Many times I have based my decision to read a book based on if it had hooked be by then. Did it make me want to continue? Did I have to know what happened next? I have created three opening scenes and decided to share. Here they are, please let me know if you were hooked.

Seraphina Kane

Sera Kane’s chin was propped up on her hand as she stared at Mr. Harper droning on about some battle fought centuries ago. It’s the last class before the weekend and by listening to the sounds fidgeting in chairs you could tell that nobody was listening or cared. All they cared about was the ringing of the bell announcing their freedom.

 Sera glanced at the clock and sighed, 10 more minutes. Something hit her arm as it landed on her desk. A note from Mia, her best...well her only friend.

“Ashton is staring at you. Again!!”

This has been going on every since Ashton, the newest and hottest arrival at Douglas High School, arrived two months ago. He had the bluest eyes I had ever seen in my life. So blue that they seem to hypnotize me whenever my eyes landed on his. Leaving me completely brain dead the entire time I was caught in his gaze.

 I had never caught him staring at me. Mia was constantly telling me that he was, however anytime I turned around he was looking at something else or he would glance at me and lift one eyebrow. Because of this I knew what to expect when I turned around, but did it anyway. As soon as I looked at him he raised his head, looked me straight in the eye, those blue eyes, lifted that one eyebrow and mouthed the word,

 “What?”

I wanted to kill Mia.

 

The In Between

Standing at the waitress station talking to my friend and co-worker Linda, I watched my tables as we shared the local gossip.

Linda wanted to share a particularly juicy bit of gossip about David Jenkins, the man I was secretly seeing. His family wanted him to marry Beth Carmichael, however he planned on telling them he wasn’t going to go through with it because he loved me. He was just waiting for the right time.

“He’s getting married tomorrow, you know. Rumor is Beth’s pregnant,” Linda whispered.

Before I could fully digest this, cook yelled my name,

“Cat, your order’s up!”

I excused myself from Linda and went to the kitchen, feeling shock and disbelief. Numbly, I walked back to the waitress station and asked Linda if she was sure.

Linda ignored me and continued to stare out at the dining room. I poked her in the shoulder. Nothing. I said her name louder this time. Still no reaction. I turned toward a bus boy and asked what was wrong with her; he completely ignored me.

I frantically looked around the room. At first everything looked the same then everyone started to move in slow motion. Sounds became slightly distorted and then…everything faded away.

That was when I noticed him.

 He was sitting on the lunch counter staring right at me.  I quickly covered my mouth, suppressing a scream.  He was of average height, no more than 6 feet tall.  His skin was so pale; it could only be described as fish-belly-white.   Pointed ears stuck out of slicked back, greasy black hair; he stared at me with eyes so black they appeared soulless. 

 

Then he smiled at me, grayish dead lips spread into an evil grin and revealed two rows of sharp white teeth. Two of the teeth were longer than the others, almost like fangs, his chin was stained red in what appeared to be blood, and he had what looked like pieces of flesh stuck between his teeth.

 

The creature jumped off the counter and as he reached a hand, tipped with black fingernails filed to sharp points, toward me he began to grow.  I stared back at him, frozen in place with absolute terror. He let out a burst of maniacal laughter and said

 

“Mine.” 

 

Unable to take my eyes off him, he continued to inflate.  I started backing up until I felt my back pressed up against the cool glass of the door and pushed it open.  His laughter filled my ears and when he spoke it was as if his voice was coming from inside my head.  

 

"Mine."

Harley Frost

 

A noise coming from somewhere in my house woke me up. I lay quietly for a few minutes listening. Nobody should be in my apartment. I sit up and looked around the room. I’m in a large four- posted bed covered in silk sheets.

 

Not my apartment.

 

Where was I?

 

More importantly how did I get here?

 

 I heard the noise again; a muffled cry. I quietly walk toward the door and opened it. The hallway is pitch black. I make my way down the hallway, hugging the wall along the way. My finger- tips find the edge of a doorway, and I peered inside.

A tall man dressed all in black is standing over a woman; she is tied to the bed and gagged. She twisted violently on the bed desperately trying to escape. I tore my eyes away from the woman to look at her attacker; that’s when I noticed him looking directly at me.

 

Can he see me?

 

Did I make a noise?

 

I backed up from the door and suddenly someone grabbed me from behind. I kicked and screamed, but they held me tighter. Opening my eyes, I find myself in my own bed with James, my partner on the police force, straddling my waist with my arms pinned above my head. I blink stupidly at him and ask,

 

"What are you doing?”

 

“You must have been having some dream.”

 

“Dream?”